Abortion Story #199: Navigating Depression

Roar will publish a first-person story about abortion, “My Abortion: A Daily Story,” every day for at least 365 days. An excerpt of Chris Ann’s story is below, in which she shares about her abortion in the context of already being a mother, navigating clinical depression, and facing judgment from doctors. Her complete blog appears on Shout Your Abortion, a “network of individuals talking about abortion on [their] own terms and creating space for others to do the same.”

“I was 23 and already had two children. We were doing okay, but it was hard. I couldn’t take hormonal birth control because it made my clinical depression worse. I asked my obstetrician for a tubal ligation and was denied because of my young age and not having yet married. I told them I wasn’t interested in any more children and likely won’t financially be able to support another, married or not. The doctor replied, “what if you marry someone else down the road and he wants to have children?”

My first child’s father had gotten another girl pregnant as the same time as me, and wasn’t in the picture at all. My boyfriend, the father of my youngest was a like a third child himself. I had experienced single motherhood with my oldest for 4 years and I knew I certainly didn’t want to be a single mom of THREE. I didn’t even want to risk it. But since the doctor didn’t feel I was wise enough to decide on a tubal ligation, I resorted to using over the counter foams and inserts…which are obviously not fool proof, and indeed, I ended up pregnant.

I immediately knew what I wanted to do. Adoption wasn’t an option. It would be too difficult to be pregnant at my job, a factory/warehouse which supported my kids. I called around, and all the clinics were at least a two-hour drive away. Because of my depression, they said I needed to get a release from my doctor…”

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