My Abortion #23: Cynthia

Roar will publish a first-person story about abortion, “My Abortion: A Daily Story,” every day for at least 365 days.

By sharing stories, Not Alone lets women who’ve had abortions know we are not alone.

Already a single mother, who depended on her  parents for support, Cynthia was in the Army when she discovered she was pregnant. This is her story.


I DISCOVERED I WAS PREGNANT WHILE SERVING IN THE ARMY.  AT THAT TIME,
THE MILITARY DID NOT ALLOW SINGLE PARENTS. I ALREADY HAD A DAUGHTER
WHO WAS LIVING WITH MY PARENTS. I KNEW THAT IF I CONTINUED THE
PREGNANCY, I WOULD BE FORCIBLY SEPARATED FROM THE ARMY. THERE WAS
LITTLE TO OFFER FROM THE SMALL TOWN WHERE MY PARENTS AND DAUGHTER
LIVED.

THE CHOICE WAS CLEAR IN MY EYES. IF I WERE TO REMAIN IN THE ARMY,
CONTINUE TO PROVIDE FINANCIAL SUPPORT FOR MY DAUGHTER, AND HOLD ONTO
MY CAREER AN ABORTION WAS MY ONLY ALTERNATIVE.

I TOOK LEAVE AND WENT TO A CLINIC A FEW HOURS AWAY FROM MY PARENTS
HOME. THE STAFF AND THE DOCTOR WERE SUPPORTIVE AND KIND.

AFTER MY RECOVERY, I WENT BACK TO WORK AND TOLD NO ONE.

I’VE NOW BEEN MARRIED 25 YEARS. I HAVE THREE CHILDREN. I HAVE OFTEN
LOOKED BACK ON THIS AND I CANNOT FIND IT WITHIN MYSELF TO REGRET THAT
CHOICE. IT WASN’T AN EASY ONE TO MAKE, BUT IT WAS A NECESSARY ONE. I
MOST CERTAINLY WOULD NOT HAVE THE LIFE I HAVE NOW WHICH I LOVE.

I DON’T TALK ABOUT THIS WITH ANYONE. THE STIGMA IS JUST TOO STRONG. NO
ONE WANTS TO HEAR THESE STORIES ABOUT OUR LIVES AND THE DECISIONS WE
MUST MAKE ALONE.

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