Big Black Bitch

after Mary Fields1 aka “Stagecoach Mary”

Ain’t much a man can call me
I ain’t already heard.
I stand taller ‘n weigh more
‘n even the legends say.
I pack two six-shooters
and a loaded ten-gauge
whether I sleep or ride.
And when shootin’ don’t work,
I pack these two fists.
I’m Black as a nightmare
to most of ya.
I’m Black.
My boots Black.
My coach ‘n team Black.
And don’t believe nobody
that say I ain’t kept that den
of wolves at bay through
an entire Black night.
It was simple. They just needed convincin’
I was as bad or worse ‘n any or alla them.
Don’t matter whether you a dog,
a mule, or a man.
When I say move, I mean move.
And I don’t need no whip
like most of y’all white boys
to get my point across.
So what you ain’t gon’ do
is call me out my name
when I ain’t in the mood.
And I ain’t never in the mood
to be called outside a my name.
Fastest way to make me act my color.
I got this here run to make,
a reputation to uphold
for bein’ on time,
‘n the only thing standin’
‘tween me, a pint of whiskey
and my end-a-the-day cigar is you.
And Neighbor, that ain’t
a position I’d recommend.
So come on.
Call me that again.
So we can all find out
what happens next.

 

1. Mary Fields was born a slave in Tennessee in 1832 and was the first Black woman to be employed as a mail carrier in the U.S. She stood six feet tall and weighed over 200 lbs. She was known for smoking cigars, carrying pistols, drinking whiskey, and getting into the occasional fight with drunken cowboys.

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